His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
where are my eyebrows?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
