She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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