Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I faked an abortion last night.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
