shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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