Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  he wants to bone in the snuggie

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  (310): he wants to bone in the snuggie http://tfl.nu/yssp
  Replies (14) Good night (2756) Bad night (1018)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"

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  (678): I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute" http://tfl.nu/6gqy
  Replies (10) Good night (1812) Bad night (3681)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.

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  (715): All I want for christmas is my sobriety back. http://tfl.nu/wb57
  Replies (8) Good night (912) Bad night (3085)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me

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  (978): literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me http://tfl.nu/9ayb
  Replies (41) Good night (5907) Bad night (1456)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.

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  (706): That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night. http://tfl.nu/8vqf
  Replies (10) Good night (5190) Bad night (1068)
• Favorite

  (+82): View more from South Korea

  You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.

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  (+82): You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes. http://tfl.nu/6vdw
  Replies (7) Good night (5604) Bad night (1280)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up

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  (905): She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up http://tfl.nu/duhi
  Replies (25) Good night (4282) Bad night (1253)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.

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  (718): He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter. http://tfl.nu/o453
  Replies (16) Good night (6985) Bad night (1206)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns

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  (978): I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns http://tfl.nu/xc39
  Replies (10) Good night (5299) Bad night (1986)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.

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  (310): I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right. http://tfl.nu/p298
  Replies (2) Good night (2054) Bad night (1140)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.

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  (713): His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life. http://tfl.nu/34re
  Replies (12) Good night (3739) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.

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  (212): Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend. http://tfl.nu/uai9
  Replies (6) Good night (2305) Bad night (867)
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!

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  (435): I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!! http://tfl.nu/1ljj
  Replies (13) Good night (2206) Bad night (587)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Do u remember buying that

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo

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  (732): Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog (814): Do u remember buying that (732): I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo http://tfl.nu/x02b
  Replies (2) Good night (1034) Bad night (562)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Stop watching porn on my work computer.

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.

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  (314): Stop watching porn on my work computer. (1-314): STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER. http://tfl.nu/jsny
  Replies (3) Good night (1822) Bad night (439)

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