found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
