I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
