What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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