I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
