who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize