They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
