Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me