Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I don't deserve a penis
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Randomize
