Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
