I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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