My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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