Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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