Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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