return my video game
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
