getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
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The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
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My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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