Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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