somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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