At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I smell stomach acid.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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