he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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