Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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