i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
