im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize