I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
