Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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