...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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