U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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