You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
