I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Randomize
