At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
