One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
