Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
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