Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Two words: blizzard sex
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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