I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
She made me pour olive oil on her.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize