When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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