my room smells like sperm. sweet.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Blood and glitter go together right?
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I forgot wine drunk hurts
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
