I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
