apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize