Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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