When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
