Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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