how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
