pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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