Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
