I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
