dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
